Visualise a bucket, stress is the water that fills up the bucket. Stress is percepted through our senses. What we see, hear or witness can affect us in a stressful way. Each person has their own stresses. Sometimes small stresses trickle into our buckets, but sometimes it gushes in. The bucket is you and it is made from all of the things that make you. Genetics and environmental and personal experiences. Each persons bucket is a different size so some can take more water than others. Buckets overflow and smaller buckets overflow more easily. When your bucket flows over the top, it has reached its capacity and this is when we present stress related panic signals.
Each persons bucket has holes in the bottom and the quantity is individual to them. These holes can be useful for you right now but not long term. Other holes work and are useful long term too. These holes are the way we frantically try to stop our buckets overflowing. Each persons holes each have their own individual label. We cannot change our bucket size but we CAN put more holes into the bottom.
For example my label holes are as follows;
- gaining control by not eating
- music through headphones
-smoking
-cutting certain people out
-strict bedtime routine
-swimming
-self-harm
-cleaning
-cooking
-scrubbing skin
-spending time with the dogs
- following my husband around
Each one represent a hole to try and avoid overflowing. As you can see some are more beneficial than others and some are positive and some negative. Whilst you are overflowing don't try and desperately adjust or take away negative holes as this can increase the flood. But when you are calm review your holes. Try to add more positive holes and when you feel ready, try to change the negative ones carefully and one at a time. The holes in our buckets are a toolbox to stop leaks and flooding of stresses. If it helps, draw it! Colour it in pretty designs and colours and make it a joy to look at, rather than something you have got to do. Be patient, persist and don't stop trying. A simple visualisation of a bucket often has joyful results and can also help you to understand others and their actions more easily. They may have a bigger bucket so the same things don't overflow theirs as yours does. Some may have smaller and may not be able to take on all the information you are giving them or things you are talking about. They may have to shut off to protect their own buckets!
GOOD LUCK!!!!